Different Than Most of My Genes

I'm back from the wedding. One thing is perfectly clear. I am nothing like my family. Here's a quick comparison list.

My Family:

- Very country
- Extremely religious
- Uneducated
- No ambition
- Measure of success is how many kids you can have
- Poor... lives very poor
- Most have never left or lived outside of the San Antonio area
- Afraid of change
- Very judgemental
- Think that women have their place, as only as wives and mothers, should never be the main provider unless single with kids (divorced, widowed, unwed mother)
- Main topic of conversation, family gossip and who is sick or dead

Me:

- Love the city

- Religious, but don't go to church
- Bachelors degree, studying for GMAT soon so I can get my MBA
- Incredibly ambitious with big dreams and goals
- Measure of success is how happy I am with how I'm living my life
- Solid upper-middle class who doesn't mind displaying wealth
- I've lived four places in Texas and four places in California
- Embrace change... change is exciting to me
- Incredibly open-minded
- I am ok being both the main bread-winner and not. A woman should do and can do whatever she puts her mind to. Gender just isn't a factor in most cases.
- Main topics of conversation work, pets, politics, pop culture

Even my brother and I, who used to be so close, are growing farther and farther apart because of our differences. I am the most successful and educated woman in my family. I'm well-spoken... they are not. MY COUSIN was making eyes at me during the reception. God... I've come such a long way.

A few of you may be wondering at this point if this a parody. It's not. It's my life. It was the way I was raised. It's amazing I turned out the way I did. Really... I credit the motivation that J gave me. He saw something in me that didn't quite fit in... something begging to get out. He nurtured it and encouraged it. And thus, I'm the person I am today.

I owe a lot of those good genes to my dad. He passed away in 1999. He was a self-employed civil engineer... college educated... and a man who knew what he wanted and how to get it. He appreciated nice houses, fast cars, boats, and other toys. He didn't really snap into the whole family thing until later in life, about seven years before he passed away. But the time that I did have with him was so precious. It was from him that I got the genes that swam up and surfaced, to spite the low expectations of my family. I think my dad always knew I could be more... but wasn't sure how to get me there. But, before he died, I had just gotten my job at the paper. Over the phone, he told me that he was proud of me. Those were the last words I ever heard my dad speak. In the hard times, it's those words that kept me there... kept me on track. J brought it out in me and provided encouragement... inside, I've had this inner drive though... the drive that comes from needing to be a daughter that my dad would be proud of.

I visited my dad's grave today. I hugged his tombstone and then put a nice lipstick kiss on it. It wasn't flowers... but I think it's better than that. I love you, dad. Happy Father's Day.

Oh yes... food today...

Breakfast:

- Veggie Omelette
- Two pieces of wheat toast, no butter, 1/2 packet of grape jelly
- 1/2 cup of hash browns with Tabasco
- Two cups of coffee with two packets of sweet n low and two half n halfs

Lunch/Dinner:

- One Czech sandwich, jalapeno, sausage and cheese
- One kolache, strawberry and cream cheese

One HUGE headache when I got home... thus why the last meal was lunch/dinner.

Yesterday's food:

Weird Breakfast:

- Chicken salad sandwich
- Snack beef stick
- 1/3 bag of nacho cheese cornuts
- Lots of water
- Can of Diet Big Red

Lunch:

- 4 oz of Salmon
- 3/4 Baked Sweet potato, very little toppings
- 1 piece of bread
- One glass of Shiraz

Wedding food:

- Two sausage tacos with rice
- One strawberry streusel piece
- 10 oz. Tea with Nutrasweet
- Can of Coors Light

After Wedding Drinks:

- One strawberry margarita
- 10 chips with salsa

Ok... I admit... not good but definitely controlled. I didn't eat all the Cornuts or get my own bag. I didn't load my sweet potato with toppings. I didn't have dessert at lunch. I didn't pig out on wedding cake. All in all, I'm pretty pleased. It's the least I've ever eaten when going home.

I'll weigh tomorrow morning.

2004-06-20 @ 8:49 p.m.
BACKWARDS // FORWARDS